Meet Angry Bob

When approaching Angry Bob’s house, yell first to announce your presence.

Do Not Let Angry Bob Near Open Flame

Occasionally at FM 94/9 the entire airstaff would take the weekend off, usually for a major holiday like Memorial Day or Labor Day.

In place of having live humans on the air, FM 94/9 would take the unusual step of automating things, and do so under the guise of a Random Shuffle or Random Demand weekend. We even had a scary-looking disc changer we called the Halloran 9000 to run things for the weekend. I was personally terrified of starting this thing up.

Angry Bob was a little bit of creative programming weirdness we would use to cover for the fact everyone had a holiday weekend off and we had a machine running the songs and breaks. Since Angry Bob usually ran over the Memorial Day, it seemed appropriate to lend Bob’s rants and Fox News positioning statements a bit of patriotic flair. And from there, some evil, zany creativity took over.

Green Vegetables: Angry Bob has never eaten these.

Angry Bob is a little bit like Muhammad. We can’t show his face.

But if you could see his face, he would likely have veins popping out of his head in the midst of yelling at a lawnmower, or perhaps waving a large marital aid over his head. That’s how we like to think of him.

We mentioned early on neither Mitt Romney or Fox News would approve of High Octane Growler. And if Glenn Beck’s planned Glenbeckistan nanny state-free penal colony in disguise really takes off in Idaho, it’s going to be a major blow for weird, goofball American diversity if we lose all of the nation’s Angry Bobs to it.

For everyone who ever had a cranky old neighbor with a crewcut who insisted on watching Bill O’Reilly on a big screen TV in his decked-out man cave garage, with the garage door opened and the volume cranked so the entire neighborhood could hear Bill’s wisdom over dinner, this is for you.

And remember, the only reason guys like Angry Bob had to watch Bill O’Reilly in the garage was because their wives couldn’t stand it and banished them from the family room so they could watch NCIS in peace. Ah, Fox. We’ll miss you when you’re gone. But the country won’t.

Thanks to Broadcast Brother Mike Hansen for the deadpan delivery and killer bumper production on these.

Thanks to Garett Michaels for enabling the idea.

Tool: Would not be welcome at Angry Bob’s next barbecue, even if they bring Thousand Island dressing.

“Honey, how many times do I have to tell you? Don’t let that glue-sniffing degenerate son of yours borrow the car!”


Leave a Comment